Thank goodness!!! We have almost made it to through our first semester of our medical marriage. We have learned a lot about each other and ourselves during this trying time.
We made a COMmitment when JM started med school that we would take a vacation at the end of the year. In 9 days, we leave for our anniversary vacation up to a resort in Wisconsin to celebrate our one year anniversary. We are both looking forward to the trip and counting down the days to spending 4 days together without homework or other responsibilities!
Whether it's a large vacation at the end of the semester or a celebratory dinner, plan time to renew your COMmitment to each other. It's crucial that time is carved out for renewal. From the medical marriage books and articles I have read, some couples find that by graduation, they don't know their spouse anymore. Don't less this happen in your marriage! Take proactive steps each semester to increase your COMmitment every step of the way.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
You are doing it all wrong...
When reviewing performance appraisals, it's easy to tell someone all of the things that they are doing wrong. Think of the last time that someone told you all of the things you did RIGHT.
Ok, stop thinking. I'll share my last experience. I specifically asked JM to tell me the following:
I feel motivated when you...
I feel supported when you...
I feel encouraged when you...
I feel most loved when you...
When he gave me his list, I knew what mattered to him. Now that I know specifically how I can motivate/love/support/encourage him, I can increase these behaviors. I even saved the list and review it often to remind me of what's important in his eyes.
To increase your COMmittment, send your spouse a list of all of the things that they are doing right.
Ok, stop thinking. I'll share my last experience. I specifically asked JM to tell me the following:
I feel motivated when you...
I feel supported when you...
I feel encouraged when you...
I feel most loved when you...
When he gave me his list, I knew what mattered to him. Now that I know specifically how I can motivate/love/support/encourage him, I can increase these behaviors. I even saved the list and review it often to remind me of what's important in his eyes.
To increase your COMmittment, send your spouse a list of all of the things that they are doing right.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Alignment
When you start developing a performance appraisal, you look to the mission statement, statement of values, or purpose statement to decide what values should be incorporated into your appraisal. In marriage, our actions often fall short of our values.
What are your values? How would you rank the following:
Love
Friendship
Humor
Sex
Equality
Quality time
Communication
Common interests
Spiritual connection
Look at how you ranked these items. If love was your number one marriage value, analyze how you act this out on a daily basis. Consider how you want your spouse to act out this value of yours.
Now, think about how your spouse would rate these items. Better yet, go ask your spouse to rank these items and have a conversation about both of your choices. Look at the values that you both share. Discuss how this affects your love language and COMmittment to each other.
What are your values? How would you rank the following:
Love
Friendship
Humor
Sex
Equality
Quality time
Communication
Common interests
Spiritual connection
Look at how you ranked these items. If love was your number one marriage value, analyze how you act this out on a daily basis. Consider how you want your spouse to act out this value of yours.
Now, think about how your spouse would rate these items. Better yet, go ask your spouse to rank these items and have a conversation about both of your choices. Look at the values that you both share. Discuss how this affects your love language and COMmittment to each other.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Are you meeting expectations?
Most people don't aim to be average. However, when you are filling out a performance appraisal average means that you are meeting expectations. In your job, meeting expectations is a good thing. But, what if you are meeting expectations in your marriage? Is that good or bad?
I've been wondering what a marriage performance appraisal would look like. Being inspired by my current class on creating an effective and fair appraisal system, I decided to start a new series.
We will start with looking at developing a performance appraisal. When you develop a PA, you need to base the appraisal on the job description. What is the job description for a wife or husband? It seems that different people bring different expectations of the role and how to live out that role. This can cause conflict in the marriage if you and your spouse do not agree on the role that each play.
The first question you have to answer is what am I measuring. When you evaluate your performance in your marriage what is the performance factor? Is it acts of service, words of affirmation, or number of gifts? Before you can decide how you are doing, you must decide what you are measuring.
Spend time evaluating how you want your performance to be measured. Do you want your spouse to only look at your intentions or is it fair to also consider the outcomes? Apply this same methodology to decide how your spouse should be evaluated.
In the next post, we will explore how to use these factors to increase your COMmitment to your spouse.
I've been wondering what a marriage performance appraisal would look like. Being inspired by my current class on creating an effective and fair appraisal system, I decided to start a new series.
We will start with looking at developing a performance appraisal. When you develop a PA, you need to base the appraisal on the job description. What is the job description for a wife or husband? It seems that different people bring different expectations of the role and how to live out that role. This can cause conflict in the marriage if you and your spouse do not agree on the role that each play.
The first question you have to answer is what am I measuring. When you evaluate your performance in your marriage what is the performance factor? Is it acts of service, words of affirmation, or number of gifts? Before you can decide how you are doing, you must decide what you are measuring.
Spend time evaluating how you want your performance to be measured. Do you want your spouse to only look at your intentions or is it fair to also consider the outcomes? Apply this same methodology to decide how your spouse should be evaluated.
In the next post, we will explore how to use these factors to increase your COMmitment to your spouse.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Don't Make Promises You Can't Keep
This past Monday during our Marriage Matters class, we played a fun Newlywed game. One of the questions asked about pet peeves. My biggest pet peeve is people who don't do what they say they are going to do. You might think this is a rare occurrence, but I see it on a regular basis.
For me, the severity does not matter. I experience the same distress from someone saying they will be on time and from someone who is a complete no show. I know it's not logical, but that's how my mind works.
Making promises that you can't keep is detrimental to customer service and marriage. It's similar to the boy who cried wolf. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. If you want people to believe what you say, it's important that you follow through with the promises that you make. To be more COMMitted, consciously make a choice to fulfill your promises, increasing the amount of trust in your relationship.
Lee
For me, the severity does not matter. I experience the same distress from someone saying they will be on time and from someone who is a complete no show. I know it's not logical, but that's how my mind works.
Making promises that you can't keep is detrimental to customer service and marriage. It's similar to the boy who cried wolf. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. If you want people to believe what you say, it's important that you follow through with the promises that you make. To be more COMMitted, consciously make a choice to fulfill your promises, increasing the amount of trust in your relationship.
Lee
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Throw in Something Extra
If you have read much about customer satisfaction research lately, you may have seen a new trend regarding customer satiation. The research shows that to actually satisfy customers, you have to do something that exceeds their expectations. One more time, for a customer to be satisfied, you must do more than they expect.
Customer service goals were previously about meeting the customer's standards. Now, the new wave of research contradicts that. To satisfy a customer, you do not have to perform a grandiose act. It could be something small like responding to an email within 12 hours when the policy states that you have 24 hours to respond. It could also be something as simple as giving them a coupon thanking them for their business.
You may start to see an inherent problem with customer satisfaction. If you start doing things that are unexpected, the customer's expectations will change. To counter this, companies must always be one step ahead and constantly find new things that they can do to exceed expectations.
How does this relate to marriage? Your spouse is most likely satisfied when their expectations are met. However, those expectations also change over time. Thus, you must constantly seek to identify these changing expectations. This week I challenge you to have an honest, open conversation with your spouse about their expectations. Once you know what they expect, try and add a little love to exceed those expectations with random acts of kindness.
Lee
Customer service goals were previously about meeting the customer's standards. Now, the new wave of research contradicts that. To satisfy a customer, you do not have to perform a grandiose act. It could be something small like responding to an email within 12 hours when the policy states that you have 24 hours to respond. It could also be something as simple as giving them a coupon thanking them for their business.
You may start to see an inherent problem with customer satisfaction. If you start doing things that are unexpected, the customer's expectations will change. To counter this, companies must always be one step ahead and constantly find new things that they can do to exceed expectations.
How does this relate to marriage? Your spouse is most likely satisfied when their expectations are met. However, those expectations also change over time. Thus, you must constantly seek to identify these changing expectations. This week I challenge you to have an honest, open conversation with your spouse about their expectations. Once you know what they expect, try and add a little love to exceed those expectations with random acts of kindness.
Lee
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Deal with Complaints
It sounds easy right? Just deal with complaints as they surface. However, most couples lean toward conflict aversion. Both parties try and let issues slide, believing they can just "let it go". But, as most of you can attest to all of those suppressed issues come to life in one explosion.
How do you prevent large explosive arguments without having a small argument everyday? I learned a long time ago that there are two extremes people fall into to: conflict aversive and conflict aggressive. As balance typically serves us well in live, we need to learn to find a balance with conflict.
If you are mad at your spouse, they shouldn't have to guess why you are mad. Now, that does not give you permission to scream a list of their offenses at them. It does not give you permission to bring up all the times you have been right. It does give you permission to calmly state how you feel and explain why you are angry, hurt, disappointed, etc. For me, I need time to work out exactly how I feel and what promoted those feelings BEFORE I can talk to JohnMark. If you don't understand how and why you feel a certain emotion, you cannot except your spouse to be psychic.
Take this customer service rule and start to apply it to your everyday married life to show your COMmittment to developing and maintaing a healthy relationship with your spouse.
Lee
How do you prevent large explosive arguments without having a small argument everyday? I learned a long time ago that there are two extremes people fall into to: conflict aversive and conflict aggressive. As balance typically serves us well in live, we need to learn to find a balance with conflict.
If you are mad at your spouse, they shouldn't have to guess why you are mad. Now, that does not give you permission to scream a list of their offenses at them. It does not give you permission to bring up all the times you have been right. It does give you permission to calmly state how you feel and explain why you are angry, hurt, disappointed, etc. For me, I need time to work out exactly how I feel and what promoted those feelings BEFORE I can talk to JohnMark. If you don't understand how and why you feel a certain emotion, you cannot except your spouse to be psychic.
Take this customer service rule and start to apply it to your everyday married life to show your COMmittment to developing and maintaing a healthy relationship with your spouse.
Lee
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
The Customer is Always Right
My husband loves to say that he can choose to be right OR happy. While it is meant as a joke, this statement does have validity. In relationships, you quickly learn that it is not always about being right. People will forget what you say, but they will always remember how you made them feel.
The challenge in marriage is learning to see more than just one right opinion. As we mature, we learn that nothing is black or white because there are many shades of gray that fall in between. In order for us to have an integrative discussion, we must focus on the elements that can be agreed on. To increase your COMmittment, reflect on how your words or lack of words has effected your spouse. Instead of focusing on being right, change your frame to find points that you agree on.
Lee
The challenge in marriage is learning to see more than just one right opinion. As we mature, we learn that nothing is black or white because there are many shades of gray that fall in between. In order for us to have an integrative discussion, we must focus on the elements that can be agreed on. To increase your COMmittment, reflect on how your words or lack of words has effected your spouse. Instead of focusing on being right, change your frame to find points that you agree on.
Lee
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Marriage Driven Excellence
Great customer service includes understanding what customers want and anticipating their future needs. It includes reducing errors, meeting individual specifications, and reducing complaints. Many business books will tell you that how a company recovers from errors will determine how many customers they retain and how many they attract. As I thought about this concept, I realized that marriage is one really long customer service test.
When you think about what to make for dinner or what birthday gift to buy, you are practicing customer service. In this case, your customer happens to be your spouse. When you leave out the bean sprouts in pad thai because you spouse doesn't like them, you are meeting a customer specification. When your husband towels off before getting out of the shower to prevent soaking the bathroom floor, he is reducing the amount of complaints he receives.
Next, examine how you recover from an argument or disagreement with your spouse. Do you tell of all your friends your frustrations? Do you give your spouse the silent treatment for a few days? Do you sleep on the couch? Or, do you let it go and enjoy the rest of the night? One of the most significant factors that determines marriage success is how the couple handles and recovers from conflict.
In the next couple weeks, I'll be covering specific customer service lessons that I have learned over the years and how they relate to building a better relationship with your spouse. These lessons will help you transform your relationship and help you recover from conflict as it occurs. Lastly, these strategies will help you become more COMmitted.
Lee
When you think about what to make for dinner or what birthday gift to buy, you are practicing customer service. In this case, your customer happens to be your spouse. When you leave out the bean sprouts in pad thai because you spouse doesn't like them, you are meeting a customer specification. When your husband towels off before getting out of the shower to prevent soaking the bathroom floor, he is reducing the amount of complaints he receives.
Next, examine how you recover from an argument or disagreement with your spouse. Do you tell of all your friends your frustrations? Do you give your spouse the silent treatment for a few days? Do you sleep on the couch? Or, do you let it go and enjoy the rest of the night? One of the most significant factors that determines marriage success is how the couple handles and recovers from conflict.
In the next couple weeks, I'll be covering specific customer service lessons that I have learned over the years and how they relate to building a better relationship with your spouse. These lessons will help you transform your relationship and help you recover from conflict as it occurs. Lastly, these strategies will help you become more COMmitted.
Lee
Sunday, August 30, 2009
COMmitted 1st Meeting
As planned, we hosted all the married M1s at our house this Saturday night. Although several had to study, we still managed to get to know several other couples. As soon as the night began, it was easy to see how much in common we have as married couples. All of the husbands were already talking about their residency and fellowship choices regarding specialties and locations. And, the wives were already talking about all of the time their husbands are studying. All of our lives have similarly and drastically changed in the past two weeks.
At the white coat ceremony, my dad had words of wisdom to share with me as the wife of a medical student. He told me that it was important that I have my own accomplishments to be proud of. He said that a lot of spouses feel that they should also receive a diploma at the end of med school because they too sacrifice. Lucky for me, I should have my PsyD finished by then. But his advice is more than that. It's about finding the little things that make a difference and that you can be proud of. For example, one of the other wives has taken up baking. For her, she has a yummy product to show at the end of the day. This small accomplishment has a way of bringing the simple pleasures back into her life that is now mostly filled with stress.
It can be very easy to lose focus of your own accomplishments when you are supporting a spouse in med school. My hope is that COMmitted can remind of us of the reason that we sacrifice our time and energy. Whether we are spouses or med students, we can stick together and know that in the end lives will be saved and changed because of the efforts of our M1s.
At the white coat ceremony, my dad had words of wisdom to share with me as the wife of a medical student. He told me that it was important that I have my own accomplishments to be proud of. He said that a lot of spouses feel that they should also receive a diploma at the end of med school because they too sacrifice. Lucky for me, I should have my PsyD finished by then. But his advice is more than that. It's about finding the little things that make a difference and that you can be proud of. For example, one of the other wives has taken up baking. For her, she has a yummy product to show at the end of the day. This small accomplishment has a way of bringing the simple pleasures back into her life that is now mostly filled with stress.
It can be very easy to lose focus of your own accomplishments when you are supporting a spouse in med school. My hope is that COMmitted can remind of us of the reason that we sacrifice our time and energy. Whether we are spouses or med students, we can stick together and know that in the end lives will be saved and changed because of the efforts of our M1s.
Friday, August 28, 2009
Rejection
Rejection is one of the hardest emotions to deal with because it is disheartening to the human spirit. It's a hard blow regardless of who you experience rejection from. If you don't know them, you are hurt because they haven't even given you a chance. If it's someone you do know, you are hurt because they are only seeing a part of you, and most likely you feel like that part was/is completely justified.
However, rejection isn't always what it seems. Sometimes, people reject you to protect themselves. For example, if you have a spouse or close friend who is training for a marathon, it can seem that they are choosing to spend time running instead of with you. What you may not recognize is that they need to run for their own sanity and stress relief. Another example would be studying. Your spouse needs to study to prove to them self that they are still able to learn and retain information. They need to feel that they are making progress and have control over the outcome of their education or career.
There are several different way to cope with rejection. First, I'll start with what not to do. Don't retaliate by rejecting them. This only creates feelings of distrust, insecurity, and resentment. The better response is to think through your own emotions. Once you have clarified your own response to the rejection, you will better understand what triggered feelings of rejection. You can then use this self discovery to shape future responses. WARNING - this self discovery will not happen over night. You can logically tell your brain that you understand the circumstances and do not wish to feel rejected any longer. However, your emotions do not change as quickly as your brain can send the electronic message.
Lee
However, rejection isn't always what it seems. Sometimes, people reject you to protect themselves. For example, if you have a spouse or close friend who is training for a marathon, it can seem that they are choosing to spend time running instead of with you. What you may not recognize is that they need to run for their own sanity and stress relief. Another example would be studying. Your spouse needs to study to prove to them self that they are still able to learn and retain information. They need to feel that they are making progress and have control over the outcome of their education or career.
There are several different way to cope with rejection. First, I'll start with what not to do. Don't retaliate by rejecting them. This only creates feelings of distrust, insecurity, and resentment. The better response is to think through your own emotions. Once you have clarified your own response to the rejection, you will better understand what triggered feelings of rejection. You can then use this self discovery to shape future responses. WARNING - this self discovery will not happen over night. You can logically tell your brain that you understand the circumstances and do not wish to feel rejected any longer. However, your emotions do not change as quickly as your brain can send the electronic message.
Lee
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Things are changing...
Well, it seems I may be the new contributor for the blog. JM has started med school this week, and I'm not sure how much time he will have to contribute. That said, we are also hoping to take this blog into a different direction. We are hosting a M1 Spouse party at our house this Saturday in hopes of meeting all the married people in his class. From there, my goal is to have a group meet once a week to share frustrations and challenges.
From what we have read, the infamous long hours of studying in med school can take a toll on any relationship. To reduce the stress, all of the experts recommending spending time with others who are in the same boat. The weekly meetings are not designed to be complaining session, but they are more designed to build friendships with people who understand the complications med school can present. A lot of the students have moved here specifically for med school and do not have a family or friends support system in place. Hopefully, we can help to fill this gap within the group.
Lee
From what we have read, the infamous long hours of studying in med school can take a toll on any relationship. To reduce the stress, all of the experts recommending spending time with others who are in the same boat. The weekly meetings are not designed to be complaining session, but they are more designed to build friendships with people who understand the complications med school can present. A lot of the students have moved here specifically for med school and do not have a family or friends support system in place. Hopefully, we can help to fill this gap within the group.
Lee
Thursday, June 4, 2009
On Negotiations
Lee can negotiate anything. It is an innate ability that she honed long before she read You Can Negotiate Anything. I oft regale people with the time that Lee almost returned an item over $20 to Target without a receipt. You see in the before time of the long, long ago there was determined woman with a singular mission, to return a hamper from the Target Home Collection...without any proof of purchase. [Thunder clashes] We sauntered, defiantly adorned in red garments herself. The children's play spaceship stopped as she entered the doors, it recognized the gravity of what was about to transpire. She placed the unopened hamper on the counter and coyly smiled as she revealed that she wanted to return the item...without any proof of purchase. [Thunder clashes] The cashier went through the traditional formalities. The item registered in the system, indeed identical items were on the shelves in that very store. The cashier read the Target policy as though they were Miranda rights. "You have the right to accept this policy, shut up, take your purchases and leave." Within minutes the store manager made his way to the counter, then the corporate office was called, then someone from Legal. The store manager stood bewildered "she's actually going to do this." They threw so many compromises: "could you give us the credit card number?" Nope. "Could you tell us in what store and what month the item was purchased?" Nope. The corporate office recognized the only amicable thing would be to return the item. Their item that could be returned no where else. But if they allowed that to happen, for a tear to form in their canvas bubble, the institution would fall. She would write books on how to return things to Target and nothing would stop the pursuit of Western purchase satisfaction. There would be a new Declaration espousing the right to life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness and returning unwanted purchases. In the end, swords flashed, sparks flew and the two parted with respectful nods of strength. The unreasonably extravagant hamper was given as a gift to another friend. Here, this is your problem now.
In the end we are all left to wonder, why do we persistently shop at Target?
Sometimes I am inspired by wife and I am happy to report that I have successfully negotiated the University of Chicago Hospital to repair a leak it should have repaired years ago. Take that complacency!
-JohnMark
In the end we are all left to wonder, why do we persistently shop at Target?
Sometimes I am inspired by wife and I am happy to report that I have successfully negotiated the University of Chicago Hospital to repair a leak it should have repaired years ago. Take that complacency!
-JohnMark
Friday, May 29, 2009
The nature of discourse
There is a new newlywed reality show that Lee and I saw for the first time last week. They asked the newlyweds what the greatest source of their arguments was. For Lee and I it is the speed at which we make decisions. Lee makes judicious, lightning fast decisions. I, however, make slow, methodical, fully-encompassing, high fidelity decisions following a great deal of research (notice the necessary inclusion of flowery language to substantiate my existence in the decision-making process). Allow me to present this simulation:
"What should we put with the watermelon in the fruit salad?"
Lee
[more watermelon!!]
[Cantaloupe]
"Cantaloupe"
JohnMark
[well, cantaloupe and honeydew are the most common staples]
[that feels rather unoriginal]
[maybe some kind of berries, like blueberries or blackberries]
....
[oranges? I don't know that those flavors are complementary]
[Although Jackson, Turkleston and Hazamire quoted in their landmark 2004 paper "The
Dynamic Ubiquity of Oranges" that oranges are the "new lettuce"]
....
[squash? that's just silly. Although it could potentially absorb the watermelon flavor]
....
"Cantaloupe"
"What should we put with the watermelon in the fruit salad?"
Lee
[more watermelon!!]
[Cantaloupe]
"Cantaloupe"
JohnMark
[well, cantaloupe and honeydew are the most common staples]
[that feels rather unoriginal]
[maybe some kind of berries, like blueberries or blackberries]
....
[oranges? I don't know that those flavors are complementary]
[Although Jackson, Turkleston and Hazamire quoted in their landmark 2004 paper "The
Dynamic Ubiquity of Oranges" that oranges are the "new lettuce"]
....
[squash? that's just silly. Although it could potentially absorb the watermelon flavor]
....
"Cantaloupe"
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
The whirlwind
It has been a little while since I posted last so I guess I need to give an update of all the goings on.
- 5/4 We did, in fact, get the condo. It was very stressful until that point. After we closed we immediately set to work moving and accepted the happy stress.
- 5/5 to 5/8 We hired painters that were able to finish (and do a FANTASTIC job) before we moved in the following Saturday. Meanwhile, we furiously packed the remaining junk.
- 5/8 After a lot of confusion my brother came up Friday night so that he was there for the move the next day. He brought a lot of stuff up from my parents' house as well.
- 5/9 We hired movers as well because of a presumed small window. The president of the condo association gave us an extension, without which we would not have been able to move in. Our movers were...well let's just say we won't be recommending them to anyone. We emptied ALL of the boxes on Saturday and were all moved in for the most part.
- 5/10 Lee and I rented a car so that we could go to CostCo, Walmart, Target and Home Depot. We unpacked the groceries, etc and then JJ and I went to go see the new Star Trek movie. It is always notable when I go to the movies anymore, so I am glad that the movie was excellent.
- 5/11 We started settling. Our neighbor was moving out for the summer and consequently she had all this meat to get rid of. After about 4 hours JJ and I finally managed to grill up some savory chicken and ribs.
- 5/12 We had our washer, dryer and sectional delivered. Then, I reestablished my dominance as the superior bowler in the family. [dusting shoulder] Bowling is another one of those things that is noteworthy when the occassion comes up again.
- 5/13 Mama Karen arrived and we cooked up Pad Thai.
- 5/14 I sacrificed myself as the one willing to go to with my mother and her twin to see a one-man theatrical reenactment of the Gospel of Mark. It was about as good as you would expect. The principal comment made was "it's amazing he could remember all that."
- 5/15 Despite the rain, we went on a Chicago River Architectual Cruise. I still enjoyed it and now we have a membership with the Chicago Architectural Foundation so anyone coming to visit in the next year should keep that in mind. ;-)
- 5/16 We went to my Aunt's house for Christmas 2. We celebrated 7 birthdays, one condo purchase, one med school acceptance, two grand parents returning for the summer, one puppy adoption and the Blackhawks advancing in the playoffs among other things.
- 5/17 We dropped off my mother and brother at the car rental offices for them to drive back home. At church we met with the interim pastor as we are going to start leading a small group at our place in June most likely.
- 5/18 Back to the grind and continuing to work on things like filing all of our documents in our new filing cabinets. Lee got to see the Today show for the first time in weeks. She had been without news that entire time.
- 5/19 I updated the blog. Mama Houston arrives in two days! Reserve your stay now, time slots are going fast!
Friday, May 8, 2009
All the Anticipation
I am running Circular Dichromism experiments in the Biophysics lab today, which means that I have a lot of intermittent time to kill without cellphone access the day before our big move. The condo is undergoing a metamorphosis right now. My parents are paying for the painting as an early birthday present. It's not quite done, but I know that it will be a well-cherished gift.
We did some moving math recently. So our problem was that we are moving from one high-rise to another elevator-necessitating building. You have to schedule the elevators for relatively small increments of time, because everyone else needs the elevators to move in/out. So we only have a 3 hour window to move from one place to the other with a half hour drive in between. Except for when Roche gave me a relocation package, I have always moved myself and for the most part Lee has moved herself. We understand the necessity of bribing friends with pizza and libation to make sure that we could move in that window. It turns out that in this economy it is just as cheap to rent professional movers for a few hours. I was stunned. I think it is just part of being in the midwest again. We are still overcoming reverse-sticker-shock. I really don't miss NY.
We did some moving math recently. So our problem was that we are moving from one high-rise to another elevator-necessitating building. You have to schedule the elevators for relatively small increments of time, because everyone else needs the elevators to move in/out. So we only have a 3 hour window to move from one place to the other with a half hour drive in between. Except for when Roche gave me a relocation package, I have always moved myself and for the most part Lee has moved herself. We understand the necessity of bribing friends with pizza and libation to make sure that we could move in that window. It turns out that in this economy it is just as cheap to rent professional movers for a few hours. I was stunned. I think it is just part of being in the midwest again. We are still overcoming reverse-sticker-shock. I really don't miss NY.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
New Condo!!
Well, Lee and I bought our first home together Monday. It was a harrowing ordeal. Our realtor and attorney were amazing. The seller was pretty good. Our lender was reprehensible. When I think about the frustration they inflicted upon us it upsets me all over again. It was all unnecessary too. They were not organized enough to find the information we had already sent and consequently we had continue to resubmit the same information over and over again. Then we could never get ahold of them. It got so bad that I had to start calling from borrowed cellphones so that someone would pick up the phone. *sigh* But it's over now....
As I said before, it is a terrific new condo that I believe will work quite well for us for the foreseeable future. You can see some preliminary video footage from the youtube video below. We will be sure to put up some pictures after we are all moved in.
We are really excited about the area. The park across the street is amazing and it will be a welcome retreat this summer. Lee loves me so much that she bought me a basketball, even though she is not likely to play with me.
We move in this Saturday so everything is in a chaotic jumble right now. The to do lists are getting long enough to type. You would think with as many moves as I have done that I would have this moving business down cold. Every time it seems to get just a little more complicated than the last time.
Lee and I have been working in opposing directions. I have been closing accounts, while she has been setting up the new ones. We might actually be moderately settled, physically and digitally, by Monday. That’s the hope anyways.
My brother heads up this weekend with a bunch of my junk from my parents’ house. I am sure my Dad will be happy to see it go. I have not allowed myself any time to think about what fun things we could do together while he is here. We are going to be plugging away in our short-sighted tunnel vision a little while longer.
If you are reading this, come visit soon.
We are currently taking bets on how long it will be before you catch us saying "oh yeah, buying the condo was a piece of cake." Even money is on November.
Love,
JohnMark
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
The Important Questions
Yesterday I found out that I was approved for the Chicago track at the University of Illinois. I did not explain this earlier, but once you are accepted to Illinois you have to go to Chicago or Urbana-Champaign. Chicago always fills up first and I was placed on the Urbana-Champaign track. Without any real effort on my part the admissions committee called to offer me a place in the Chicago track! I was going to wait until after we purchased the condo to make a big stink. Now, everything is settled…except the condo. We are supposed to close tomorrow and I genuinely have NO idea if that will happen. It appears that the seller is willing to give us an extension if necessary. I am praying for the stress to stop. I am sure I will be able to look back and laugh at how comically inefficient this process was, but not until after it’s over. Currently, everything is at the underwriter’s office. Fyi, the appraisal came back 50% higher than our purchase price, which is terrific in th
is climate!
For the last month or so I have been doing a fair amount of spiritual contemplation. I keep coming back to Luke 12:48 “For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required…” At Willow we have spent some time considering the topic, which has lain especially hard on my heart of late. Yes, I have worked hard to develop the gifts God has given me. Nevertheless, I feel undeserving of all that I have been given and I want to know what God wants from my life. I have been doing more reading lately. Lee’s mother gave us The Shack, which is an excellent allegorical examination of the age-old question “Why would a benevolent God allow such terrible atrocities to occur?” Currently, I am reading The Hole In Our Gospel, which was basically given to us by Willow. The book is almost confrontational in its quest to have the reader examine themselves and whether they have truly surrendered to God and what that really means. I find surrender difficult. Until I can fully surrender I don’t think I am going to be able to answer the questions on my heart:
“What does God require of me?”
“Why have I been given these abilities and these opportunities?”
“How does my faith affect my life?”
“How does my life affect others’?”
-searching servant
is climate!For the last month or so I have been doing a fair amount of spiritual contemplation. I keep coming back to Luke 12:48 “For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required…” At Willow we have spent some time considering the topic, which has lain especially hard on my heart of late. Yes, I have worked hard to develop the gifts God has given me. Nevertheless, I feel undeserving of all that I have been given and I want to know what God wants from my life. I have been doing more reading lately. Lee’s mother gave us The Shack, which is an excellent allegorical examination of the age-old question “Why would a benevolent God allow such terrible atrocities to occur?” Currently, I am reading The Hole In Our Gospel, which was basically given to us by Willow. The book is almost confrontational in its quest to have the reader examine themselves and whether they have truly surrendered to God and what that really means. I find surrender difficult. Until I can fully surrender I don’t think I am going to be able to answer the questions on my heart:
“What does God require of me?”
“Why have I been given these abilities and these opportunities?”
“How does my faith affect my life?”
“How does my life affect others’?”
-searching servant
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Feed My Starving Children
Last weekend Lee and I volunteered for Feed My Starving Children, an organization that supplies food for school-age children throughout impoverished areas of Africa. After a long introduction we were ushered into the staging area for a rundown of what to do and then everyone started working assembly-line style. We added rice, vegetarian chicken flavoring, soy and dried veggies to a bag that would eventually be used to make lunch for 6 children. The cost of this bag was $1.02 or 17 cents per child. The work was not very hard and I would think it would be pretty easy to automate. It occurred to us after the fact that it was actually a marketing event shrouded by altruism to drum up donations. Pretty good idea if you ask me. You are asking people that are obviously more giving by nature and they really weren't asking for a lot. It never fully sinks in that $42 could be enough to feed someone on the other side of the world for a year.
Tonight we begin packing. We close next week, so we are kind of going to be living out of boxes for the next several weeks. Very exciting, somewhat stressful times. The cats, in particular, are excited about all the new boxes to sit on.
Tonight we begin packing. We close next week, so we are kind of going to be living out of boxes for the next several weeks. Very exciting, somewhat stressful times. The cats, in particular, are excited about all the new boxes to sit on.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Two Weeks Notice
Last night, despite being a little sick, Lee and I had a fun date watching the Bulls lose in tragic fashion. We made Shawn Marion and Chris Bosh look like first ballot hall-of-famers. Our front line defense is reprehensible. Garnet and the Celtics are going to eat us alive in the playoffs if this trend continues. I will try to post pictures all the same.
Did anyone else see the link came from www.espnchicago.com? I'm excited about that at least.
We close on our condo two weeks from today. I am told we will hear back from the underwriter today, I should take care of the condo insurance shortly and we have already found a subletter for the summer.
It occurred to me that somewhere along the way, I became Middle-Aged Man to my friends. If you have never seen the sketch it was a hilarious short-lived sketch about a super hero whose super power was being middle-aged and thus having the knowledge and wisdom of a middle-aged person. So, he would randomly pop into young couples' personal discussions about buying a home, saving for retirement, etc. The character died because he required to much research in order to do the sketches, which I find funny in and of itself. With one exception, of my core nucleus of friends, my 20 closest friends, I am the only one that owns a home, the only one to have had a career-level job, the only one with a graduate degree, one of a small handful that is married, etc. I accelerated to middle age pretty fast and I have become the go-to source of background info on life-altering decisions. I don't really understand it though. I don't believe there is an intellectual gap between us, why was I the only one? I made a lot of friends in graduate school and, not surprisingly, a lot of them will be joining the ranks of middle age soon, but still...
-JohnMark
Did anyone else see the link came from www.espnchicago.com? I'm excited about that at least.
We close on our condo two weeks from today. I am told we will hear back from the underwriter today, I should take care of the condo insurance shortly and we have already found a subletter for the summer.
It occurred to me that somewhere along the way, I became Middle-Aged Man to my friends. If you have never seen the sketch it was a hilarious short-lived sketch about a super hero whose super power was being middle-aged and thus having the knowledge and wisdom of a middle-aged person. So, he would randomly pop into young couples' personal discussions about buying a home, saving for retirement, etc. The character died because he required to much research in order to do the sketches, which I find funny in and of itself. With one exception, of my core nucleus of friends, my 20 closest friends, I am the only one that owns a home, the only one to have had a career-level job, the only one with a graduate degree, one of a small handful that is married, etc. I accelerated to middle age pretty fast and I have become the go-to source of background info on life-altering decisions. I don't really understand it though. I don't believe there is an intellectual gap between us, why was I the only one? I made a lot of friends in graduate school and, not surprisingly, a lot of them will be joining the ranks of middle age soon, but still...
-JohnMark
Friday, April 10, 2009
Good Friday
As we head into Easter weekend, I am pausing to reflect on sacrifice. The sacrifices of my loved ones for me and the sacrifices I have made for my loved ones. At a time when so many others are hurting it is feels unusual to accept all the blessings I am being afforded. In the lat couple of weeks I have received the following (among others):
-Admission to my first choice for medical school
-an interview invitation to another medical school
-two random job offers
-my first rent check, thus ending a long financial burden
-a series of complements of which I feel undeserving
-an accepted offer towards what I presume to be my home for the next decade
-joy that Lee's education is taking her in so many exciting directions
At the same time, I have a young cousin that has inflicted with a dibilitating disease. Our best friends at church have been struggling as one of them is slowly overcoming a very serious infection. Lee's best friend at school is going through a painful separation. Many friends have lost their jobs, it feels as though everyone has lost job security. An untold number of people have lost the financial security they have been building for a lifetime... Why are we so blessed? Why now?
Our road lays before us, long and precipitous. How many can say the same?
-Admission to my first choice for medical school
-an interview invitation to another medical school
-two random job offers
-my first rent check, thus ending a long financial burden
-a series of complements of which I feel undeserving
-an accepted offer towards what I presume to be my home for the next decade
-joy that Lee's education is taking her in so many exciting directions
At the same time, I have a young cousin that has inflicted with a dibilitating disease. Our best friends at church have been struggling as one of them is slowly overcoming a very serious infection. Lee's best friend at school is going through a painful separation. Many friends have lost their jobs, it feels as though everyone has lost job security. An untold number of people have lost the financial security they have been building for a lifetime... Why are we so blessed? Why now?
Our road lays before us, long and precipitous. How many can say the same?
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Hardest dollar I ever earned
When I was about 12 my friend and I decided to create a lawn-mowing business. We called the business Diamond Fields. I have no idea why we thought that was a good name for a lawn-mowing business or what it has to do with lawns or mowing or anything. Essentially, I think it was because it made for an easy logo. I do not know how much business cards cost back then, but it certainly was more than we had. We created our business cards on the back of my Dad's legal cards. The theory went that people won't stiff the son of an attorney. I am glad to say that we were never stiffed, but we didn't know how to negotiate back then either. I will never forget what may have been our first job. We didn't know what we were worth and a guy paid us $7 to cut his yard which was more jungle than lawn. The grass was taller than I was which wasn't such a huge problem, but the mower would conk out on me every few feet. All of the downed grass kept clogging the blades. We finished in just under 4 hours. Our efforts were worth less than a dollar an hour.
Yesterday, Lee and I received our first rent check. I sat at the counter staring at the check, all the while wishing that I was mowing yards again. It seemed more profitable.
-JohnMark
Yesterday, Lee and I received our first rent check. I sat at the counter staring at the check, all the while wishing that I was mowing yards again. It seemed more profitable.
-JohnMark
Sunday, April 5, 2009
The Doctors Derryberry
Well, I finally received my acceptance letter to the University of Illinois Chicago on Friday. Lee was in New Orleans the past few days for a Business Psychology conference. So when the letter finally came I had to wait to open it until she called me back. Biscuit, Gravy and I sat on the couch looking at the letter intently, trying to decipher meaning from the size, shape and weight the way a child handles all the packages under the Christmas tree.
Last night, we went to Cafe Ba-Ba-Reeba to celebrate. The food was absolutely delicious. I should try to make it into medical school once a month or something.
Lee and I have started to discuss paint colors. We recognize that the vast whiteness of our new place is a little overwhelming. Despite the way that it may appear the place is retina-blinding white. Our plan is to paint 4 weeks from now and move in 5-6 weeks from now. I think there is something about loft-style spaces that demands bold color choices. I have been looking at the other units for sale in the building. It amuses me the number of people that bought a unit at auction, painted, staged and then put it on the market +$100,000 list price. Here is an example of a virtually identical unit that converted the den area into a third bedroom.
Anyone have a painter's ladder we could borrow?
-JohnMark
Last night, we went to Cafe Ba-Ba-Reeba to celebrate. The food was absolutely delicious. I should try to make it into medical school once a month or something.
Lee and I have started to discuss paint colors. We recognize that the vast whiteness of our new place is a little overwhelming. Despite the way that it may appear the place is retina-blinding white. Our plan is to paint 4 weeks from now and move in 5-6 weeks from now. I think there is something about loft-style spaces that demands bold color choices. I have been looking at the other units for sale in the building. It amuses me the number of people that bought a unit at auction, painted, staged and then put it on the market +$100,000 list price. Here is an example of a virtually identical unit that converted the den area into a third bedroom.
Anyone have a painter's ladder we could borrow?
-JohnMark
Thursday, April 2, 2009
The story of our home
In a bizarre turn of events, it appears that Lee and I will be closing on our first home together in four weeks. We had been looking a little and were contemplating signing our first offer when a rare opportunity came along...
The story of our Home begins in the roaring 20s where a boy named Samuel began to establish himself as a salesman of kitchen gadgets along the Coney Island boardwalk. In 1935, he gave birth to a son named Ron. As Ron grew up he became part and parcel of his father's trade. Samuel began to understand client demands and invented a device that proved very efficient at chopping vegatables. Samuel and Ron began selling their gadget but they soon discovered a fundamental problem. The gadget was so efficient that they were spending a small fortune in vegetables demonstrating how efficient it was. Ron decided to tape a single demonstration and then replay it consecutively. With the chopper selling like hotcakes, Ron was free to develop gadgets of his own. After a decade Ron had amassed an empire of gadgets, commercials and taglines. As a matter of distribution it became necessary to setup warehouses throughout the country. Ron, the creator of Ronco, is Ron Popeil. Upon selling Ronco in 2005, some of the assets were sold by the holding company. Among those assets was a warehouses he built in the South Loop of Chicago near the train yards. After extensive remodeling that warehouse became what will be our home. And now you know the rest of the story. Good day.
Our side story begins in the late 90s when an overinflated economy decided to sigh...or something. When the secondary mortgage market fell into shambles the developers of our building couldn't sell any of the units because no one could finance them. They held an auction for the remaining units. Investors poured in. The financing still fell through with two of the units. We will be closing on one of those two units at 48% of the original listing price.
The story of our Home begins in the roaring 20s where a boy named Samuel began to establish himself as a salesman of kitchen gadgets along the Coney Island boardwalk. In 1935, he gave birth to a son named Ron. As Ron grew up he became part and parcel of his father's trade. Samuel began to understand client demands and invented a device that proved very efficient at chopping vegatables. Samuel and Ron began selling their gadget but they soon discovered a fundamental problem. The gadget was so efficient that they were spending a small fortune in vegetables demonstrating how efficient it was. Ron decided to tape a single demonstration and then replay it consecutively. With the chopper selling like hotcakes, Ron was free to develop gadgets of his own. After a decade Ron had amassed an empire of gadgets, commercials and taglines. As a matter of distribution it became necessary to setup warehouses throughout the country. Ron, the creator of Ronco, is Ron Popeil. Upon selling Ronco in 2005, some of the assets were sold by the holding company. Among those assets was a warehouses he built in the South Loop of Chicago near the train yards. After extensive remodeling that warehouse became what will be our home. And now you know the rest of the story. Good day.
Our side story begins in the late 90s when an overinflated economy decided to sigh...or something. When the secondary mortgage market fell into shambles the developers of our building couldn't sell any of the units because no one could finance them. They held an auction for the remaining units. Investors poured in. The financing still fell through with two of the units. We will be closing on one of those two units at 48% of the original listing price.
Friday, March 27, 2009
Ambiguous update
Today, the UIC Applicant Status Check read:
"A final decision was made on your application on 03-27-09. Please allow two-weeks to receive the correspondence in the mail. If you do not receive this correspondence in two-weeks, please contact the Admissions Office. No decision will be given over the telephone."
"A final decision was made on your application on 03-27-09. Please allow two-weeks to receive the correspondence in the mail. If you do not receive this correspondence in two-weeks, please contact the Admissions Office. No decision will be given over the telephone."
Monday, March 23, 2009
Bring on the distractions
It may not be an accurate mindset, but as of Saturday I entered "any day now" mode about medical school. I will exercise my restraint by only checking the mail once a day, which really is not hard to do since I am not there.
Lee and I went house hunting this past weekend. It is unbelievable what things are going for now. Lee and I planned on finding something that was a little dated that we could spruce up over time but the new constructions/renovations are SO cheap that there is no way that we could ever remodel so well for the relative price difference. Just to give you an idea, there was one place that we saw that was immaculate. Absolutely the best materials available. The area is one that has been undergoing gentrification for the past couple decades. The street it is on is very nice though. It was a 3 unit building, all basically the same. The top unit sold for 333,000 in 10/07. The bottom unit sold for 310,000 in 6/08. The middle unit dropped its list price to 219,000.
The only drawback to the weekend was that we found out that a lot of condos do not accept FHA loans. Unfortunately, living in areas close to mass transit means looking at condos almost exclusively. We are diligently scrounging every penny and trying to find additional work where possible. It is our hope that 20% might be within our reach at closing and that we don't wipe ourselves out in the process. Meanwhile, we are trying to obviate the supplemental condo association hoops.
Anyone out there need any medicinal chemistry consultation?
-JohnMark
Lee and I went house hunting this past weekend. It is unbelievable what things are going for now. Lee and I planned on finding something that was a little dated that we could spruce up over time but the new constructions/renovations are SO cheap that there is no way that we could ever remodel so well for the relative price difference. Just to give you an idea, there was one place that we saw that was immaculate. Absolutely the best materials available. The area is one that has been undergoing gentrification for the past couple decades. The street it is on is very nice though. It was a 3 unit building, all basically the same. The top unit sold for 333,000 in 10/07. The bottom unit sold for 310,000 in 6/08. The middle unit dropped its list price to 219,000.
The only drawback to the weekend was that we found out that a lot of condos do not accept FHA loans. Unfortunately, living in areas close to mass transit means looking at condos almost exclusively. We are diligently scrounging every penny and trying to find additional work where possible. It is our hope that 20% might be within our reach at closing and that we don't wipe ourselves out in the process. Meanwhile, we are trying to obviate the supplemental condo association hoops.
Anyone out there need any medicinal chemistry consultation?
-JohnMark
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Busy Daze
Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Last weekend we went down to Kentucky for Lisa's Birthday (Lee's mother). We had a very peaceful ride on the train down to Carbondale, where we were picked up. Going back to Kentucky or Oklahoma always illuminates the parity of what our lives were and what they are now. I have driven a car a handful of times in the last 6 months. The distant screeching of trains is a lullaby. Everything we need is within walking distance (walkscore 98). Everything slowed down. It was so peaceful, calm, primal. Apart from familial encounters, our primary focus everyday was food. Breakfast, lunch and dinner galore. I cannot recall a time that I have had better Southern cooking. I have yet to brave the scale.
It was terrific to see Mama Houston and we even headed further out to see the relatives in Mayfield. As the custom goes, everyone felt obliged to give me a tour. It seems oddly coincidental that we will be looking at houses here in Chicago this weekend.
I discovered that Lee and I have opposing "time styles." Naturally, this was not news to Lee. Somewhere along the way I became terrible at determining how long things take. When I was younger I could approximate how long it took to arrive at places. 5 miles = 6 minutes. When I try to give a realistic timeframe here, it is always the best case scenario in actual practice. Hopstop and google maps always lowball things. I never thought of myself as a "dreamer," because I accomplish things. I am not just talk. Yeah for oxymorons.
Thursday is Match Day, the day when all the graduating medical seniors are assigned to their residencies. Consequently, Friday is when the wait will officially begin as to whether I am accepted at UIC. I am hoping to hear within the next couple weeks. Please continue to pray for me until then.
-JohnMark
Last weekend we went down to Kentucky for Lisa's Birthday (Lee's mother). We had a very peaceful ride on the train down to Carbondale, where we were picked up. Going back to Kentucky or Oklahoma always illuminates the parity of what our lives were and what they are now. I have driven a car a handful of times in the last 6 months. The distant screeching of trains is a lullaby. Everything we need is within walking distance (walkscore 98). Everything slowed down. It was so peaceful, calm, primal. Apart from familial encounters, our primary focus everyday was food. Breakfast, lunch and dinner galore. I cannot recall a time that I have had better Southern cooking. I have yet to brave the scale.
It was terrific to see Mama Houston and we even headed further out to see the relatives in Mayfield. As the custom goes, everyone felt obliged to give me a tour. It seems oddly coincidental that we will be looking at houses here in Chicago this weekend.
I discovered that Lee and I have opposing "time styles." Naturally, this was not news to Lee. Somewhere along the way I became terrible at determining how long things take. When I was younger I could approximate how long it took to arrive at places. 5 miles = 6 minutes. When I try to give a realistic timeframe here, it is always the best case scenario in actual practice. Hopstop and google maps always lowball things. I never thought of myself as a "dreamer," because I accomplish things. I am not just talk. Yeah for oxymorons.
Thursday is Match Day, the day when all the graduating medical seniors are assigned to their residencies. Consequently, Friday is when the wait will officially begin as to whether I am accepted at UIC. I am hoping to hear within the next couple weeks. Please continue to pray for me until then.
-JohnMark
JM's Dancing Debut
Oh, I know that you all have been waiting for this. After me yelling at just about everyone at Carnival, they have finally located the DVD that we ordered in January. For awhile there, I thought that they had lost it, and we wouldn't be able to share this most special memory with you.
I know you are going to love it...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wiOSd4vZwiA
I know you are going to love it...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wiOSd4vZwiA
Saturday, March 7, 2009
House Info
Well, Lee and I are landlords! The house was finally rented out on Thursday. It is such a HUGE relief for me. At times, it seemed like this day would never come. I purchased the house in November 2007 and we tried to put it up for sell a year later. Ofcourse, the market had taken an awful turn by that time. A relative of a neighbor asked if we would be interested in renting it out, so we began preparing to rent it out then. It was ultimately ready in January (which was the when the neighbor's relative's lease was up). The house was inspected-failed, inspected-passed-wrong paperwork, inspected-failed and as of Thursday inspected-passed. Mind you, the renter had to move in when she left her former residence. The bureaucracy took over a month to get everything straight. Everyday I would disillusion myself that "today was the day." The day I finally gave up and decided to focus on something else was the day we received the news. To sugarcoat everything they will retroactively be paying the missed rent. We will be receiving twice our monthly mortgage payment (15-yr mortgage even).
Lee and I had some difficulty accumulating all of the necessary documents for our taxes this year. We decided that we would have our taxes done, because we both consulted, had 9 w-2s, moved 2-5 times, attended school, repaired a house, etc. I am sure glad we did. I ended up having to pay a hundred-fold less than I thought thanks to some clever CPAs. All of a sudden, purchasing a house in IL seems more reasonable. That is our next big project.
Lee and I had some difficulty accumulating all of the necessary documents for our taxes this year. We decided that we would have our taxes done, because we both consulted, had 9 w-2s, moved 2-5 times, attended school, repaired a house, etc. I am sure glad we did. I ended up having to pay a hundred-fold less than I thought thanks to some clever CPAs. All of a sudden, purchasing a house in IL seems more reasonable. That is our next big project.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Square Root Day
I have been trying to avoid thinking about med school by dwelling on other things. Lately, I have been focusing on the OKC house, which is not a superior alternative. It is so aggravating and nerve-racking trying to settle all of this mess. Everyday brings new promise and new disappointment. The house is terrific, all parties agree, but somehow bureaucracy rules the day. The wheels turn incalculably slow.
I am trying to be proactive by working on things over which I have some slight level of control. This week my focus is on getting back on track with an exercise regimen. Since I fell off the wagon I have not gained any weight back. I am still ahead of my weightloss schedule but not by much.
PS 3/3/09 is square root day.
JohnMark
I am trying to be proactive by working on things over which I have some slight level of control. This week my focus is on getting back on track with an exercise regimen. Since I fell off the wagon I have not gained any weight back. I am still ahead of my weightloss schedule but not by much.
PS 3/3/09 is square root day.
JohnMark
Sunday, March 1, 2009
First Devotional
Hello Dear Reader,
Lee and I have started our first devotional as a married couple. We went through several devotionals prior to gettin' hitched, but we took a break since we haven't "had time." Consequently we started Your Time-Starved Marriage. The irony is, naturally, that we did not feel quite so time-starved as soon as we began the devotional. I think it is a quality book, it has already hit upon an unrecognized problem of mine. I have a tendency to think "we'll go out and do more after the house is rented (still a "no" for those of you playing the home game)," or "...after med school" or "after my residency." We are both planners (it's true whether Lee believes it or not) and consequently we have to push ourselves a little more to live in the moment.
In the current moment, I feel that I am in a vacuous waiting game. Waiting to hear about the house, waiting to hear about med school interviews and an acceptance, etc. I am usually very patient.
-JohnMark
Lee and I have started our first devotional as a married couple. We went through several devotionals prior to gettin' hitched, but we took a break since we haven't "had time." Consequently we started Your Time-Starved Marriage. The irony is, naturally, that we did not feel quite so time-starved as soon as we began the devotional. I think it is a quality book, it has already hit upon an unrecognized problem of mine. I have a tendency to think "we'll go out and do more after the house is rented (still a "no" for those of you playing the home game)," or "...after med school" or "after my residency." We are both planners (it's true whether Lee believes it or not) and consequently we have to push ourselves a little more to live in the moment.
In the current moment, I feel that I am in a vacuous waiting game. Waiting to hear about the house, waiting to hear about med school interviews and an acceptance, etc. I am usually very patient.
-JohnMark
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Interview
I believe that the interviews went well. Lee helped me assemble a show file, which is just a folder with transparencies that includes my CV, application information and publications. It is a quick, effective way to demonstrate what I have done. I also learned there is such a thing as resume paper.
Pros - UIC was terrific. The research facilities dwarf all the other medical schools I have seen. The location is awesome: 2nd largest medical district in the country, convenient public transportation. Because it is the largest medical school in the country, there are more research and specialization study opportunities than other medical school. Med Students seemed much happier there than average. License exam pass rates and residency match rates are far above average.
Cons - It can be easy to get lost in the shuffle, you have to make additional effort to stand out. You have to standout to improve your odds of getting into a top residency. The class rooms are rather old. There are 4 campuses and a lottery system determines where you go. I will probably have to file a petition to stay in Chicago.
Unfortunate news - I had always heard that you need to apply early. The due date for applications was 11/15. I submitted everything in late August/early September, which is the earliest possible date I could submit everything. (In a perfect world you make the decision to go to medical school AT LEAST two years before you attempted to go.) At this point, medical schools are required to have sent at least as many offer letters as they have spots available. What it means is that I cleared the GPA and MCAT score requirements for all the schools, but they might fill up all their available positions before even looking at my application. Passive rejection.
Due to schedule conflicts, I may not hear about whether or not I made it in until the beginning of April. This is such an incredulously long process.
I am going to call the schools to see if I cannot get some kind of feedback about whether or not I might be invited for an interview.
Please continue to pray for me. Thank you so much for all of your prayers and support.
Love,
JohnMark
Pros - UIC was terrific. The research facilities dwarf all the other medical schools I have seen. The location is awesome: 2nd largest medical district in the country, convenient public transportation. Because it is the largest medical school in the country, there are more research and specialization study opportunities than other medical school. Med Students seemed much happier there than average. License exam pass rates and residency match rates are far above average.
Cons - It can be easy to get lost in the shuffle, you have to make additional effort to stand out. You have to standout to improve your odds of getting into a top residency. The class rooms are rather old. There are 4 campuses and a lottery system determines where you go. I will probably have to file a petition to stay in Chicago.
Unfortunate news - I had always heard that you need to apply early. The due date for applications was 11/15. I submitted everything in late August/early September, which is the earliest possible date I could submit everything. (In a perfect world you make the decision to go to medical school AT LEAST two years before you attempted to go.) At this point, medical schools are required to have sent at least as many offer letters as they have spots available. What it means is that I cleared the GPA and MCAT score requirements for all the schools, but they might fill up all their available positions before even looking at my application. Passive rejection.
Due to schedule conflicts, I may not hear about whether or not I made it in until the beginning of April. This is such an incredulously long process.
I am going to call the schools to see if I cannot get some kind of feedback about whether or not I might be invited for an interview.
Please continue to pray for me. Thank you so much for all of your prayers and support.
Love,
JohnMark
Monday, February 23, 2009
Pray for me
This time tomorrow I should be wrapping up my first med school interview at the University of Illinois Chicago. I am very nervous, because it is almost March and I have not heard from anyone else. I applied later in the cycle than most, because I took my MCAT in August. Plus, I only have a few options since I am trying to stay in Chicago with Lee. This one has to count. I have a 1 in 2.3 chance of getting in at this point as an instate resident, which by med school numbers is admittedly high...
Please say a little prayer for me.
JohnMark
Please say a little prayer for me.
JohnMark
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Pandora
When I am feeling a little rundown I like to listen to music while doing more menial tasks. Yesterday, I discovered Pandora. (Yes, I am aware this would appear behind the times for many of you.) Pandora is an online radio station that tailors itself to your musical interests based on tonality, key configuration, vocal inflections and a host of other quantifiable aspects of your musical "taste." All you have to do is pick a song or group you especially like and let the magic happen. I used to think that I had very eclectic taste in music, and most would agree. I am not so sure anymore. It is also an interesting way to discover likable music you've probably never heard before. Enjoy.
Lee and I are still trying to figure out ways of infusing more rest in our schedules...something is going to have to give. We need something more sustainable.
-JohnMark
Lee and I are still trying to figure out ways of infusing more rest in our schedules...something is going to have to give. We need something more sustainable.
-JohnMark
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Valentine's Day!
Lee and I celebrated our first Valentine's Day as a married couple. It has already been 42 days, but it only feels like 33. Really it's our first Valentine's Day. I always used to hate Valentine's Day, it just seemed like a large reminder to feel bad about yourself if you were single. Consequently, I chose not to celebrate it even when I was not single......I have been informed that I have changed my mind. So, we went out to eat at Adobo and then watched a show at Second City. If you were wondering "didn't you just go to Second City?" the answer would be yes. However, we went to an amateur show the first time, which just left us with the desire to see a show with one of the signature groups. We saw "Brother, Can You Spare Some Change?". Among other things, it was a hilarious take on our financial and political systems and the unrealistic expectations of what Obama may be able to accomplish:
Is it true he's going to turn Guantanamo Bay into an amusement park?
Is it true he is going to turn subprime mortgages into gumdrops? etc etc
Beyond that we have just stayed home, cooked together several times and worked on our various projects. It may sound odd, but it is a lot easier to work on all of our various projects if the other one is in the room. I enjoy our time together, even if it is semi-apart.
Is it true he's going to turn Guantanamo Bay into an amusement park?
Is it true he is going to turn subprime mortgages into gumdrops? etc etc
Beyond that we have just stayed home, cooked together several times and worked on our various projects. It may sound odd, but it is a lot easier to work on all of our various projects if the other one is in the room. I enjoy our time together, even if it is semi-apart.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Just some Tuesday
This morning I found it difficult to head into work. I have days where I just don't feel like getting up, but today I struggled to go into work...and I am a workaholic. Instead, I spent time at the computer researching terrible movies for a friend's competition.
The University of Chicago Medical Center has been a sea of negativity lately:
1) Yesterday it was anounced that the hospital was going to lay off 450 people with more to follow. Large swafts of the hospital were already falling into a state of disrepair and since service workers are the first to go, it will get much worse.
2) Chicago was revealed to be #3 on the most miserable city list. I think poverty stricken areas, like the area that surrounds the Hospital, are usually the areas most likely to feel the deepest misery. When I am with Lee or in the loop it feels like a magically wondrous place.
3) My research has been going very poorly. Often, I don't feel like I do anything, but it is because I am waiting on something all the time. The truth is we don't have the money in the lab to conduct high-level research. The Primary Ivestigator is an incredibly brilliant guy and he is working tirelessly on grants, but there just aren't any to be had...although that is supposed to change with the stimulus package.
4) Tuesdays and Thursday I am slated to leave and return >15 hours later...just in time for bed.
I think all of this might be getting to me a little bit. I am very glad that I worked here , if for no other reason than to recognize that it is not where I want to go to medical school. It was my first choice.
At this point I am just planning on eeking out the next few months in the hopes that I will begin medical school and move on to something more intellectually challenging and less emotionally taxing.
-JohnMark
The University of Chicago Medical Center has been a sea of negativity lately:
1) Yesterday it was anounced that the hospital was going to lay off 450 people with more to follow. Large swafts of the hospital were already falling into a state of disrepair and since service workers are the first to go, it will get much worse.
2) Chicago was revealed to be #3 on the most miserable city list. I think poverty stricken areas, like the area that surrounds the Hospital, are usually the areas most likely to feel the deepest misery. When I am with Lee or in the loop it feels like a magically wondrous place.
3) My research has been going very poorly. Often, I don't feel like I do anything, but it is because I am waiting on something all the time. The truth is we don't have the money in the lab to conduct high-level research. The Primary Ivestigator is an incredibly brilliant guy and he is working tirelessly on grants, but there just aren't any to be had...although that is supposed to change with the stimulus package.
4) Tuesdays and Thursday I am slated to leave and return >15 hours later...just in time for bed.
I think all of this might be getting to me a little bit. I am very glad that I worked here , if for no other reason than to recognize that it is not where I want to go to medical school. It was my first choice.
At this point I am just planning on eeking out the next few months in the hopes that I will begin medical school and move on to something more intellectually challenging and less emotionally taxing.
-JohnMark
Friday, February 6, 2009
Superbowl and other
Man, I have been slacking on the blogz lately.
Lee and I are trying to settle into our rather busy new routine. In a time when so many are looking for work, it seems odd that we both have multiple jobs. Consequently, we have to be more diligent about making time for one another. It is possible for us to accidentally misschedule projects such that we only spend a few hours together every week. We do what we can with the time we have.
Last weekend, we went to a superbowl party held by some friends from church. It was very odd not hosting a party... I became critical of things that would have been different had I thrown a party. For example, there were plenty of chips and dips at the party, but no hamburgers, hot dogs, pizza, etc. Nothing one would confuse with a meal anyways. I only seemed to able to let it go after the Superbowl.
Tonight, we are going to Second City to watch an amateur improv show based on an audience members ipod.
Lee's Father has an intentionally long layover in Chicago tomorrow. I don't think that ther is a plan yet, but it will be nice to see him. Maybe we can introduce him to Chicago-style pizza.
We are so close to renting our Oklahoma City house....it just keeps getting pushed back for inane reasons like inspections. I am saying "this week it should be rented" but I also said that last week. Meanwhile, our prospective renter has been semi-homeless. We hope to post remodeling pictures soon.
I have my first med school interview in a little over two weeks. This one will be at UIC. Pray for me.
Lastly, I read an interesting article about the nature of the problems with the scientific job model. The article aptly compares it to a pyramid scheme. Until it changes, do your loved ones a favor and dissuade them from pursuing the sciences. Friends don't let friends become scientists.
-JohnMark
Lee and I are trying to settle into our rather busy new routine. In a time when so many are looking for work, it seems odd that we both have multiple jobs. Consequently, we have to be more diligent about making time for one another. It is possible for us to accidentally misschedule projects such that we only spend a few hours together every week. We do what we can with the time we have.
Last weekend, we went to a superbowl party held by some friends from church. It was very odd not hosting a party... I became critical of things that would have been different had I thrown a party. For example, there were plenty of chips and dips at the party, but no hamburgers, hot dogs, pizza, etc. Nothing one would confuse with a meal anyways. I only seemed to able to let it go after the Superbowl.
Tonight, we are going to Second City to watch an amateur improv show based on an audience members ipod.
Lee's Father has an intentionally long layover in Chicago tomorrow. I don't think that ther is a plan yet, but it will be nice to see him. Maybe we can introduce him to Chicago-style pizza.
We are so close to renting our Oklahoma City house....it just keeps getting pushed back for inane reasons like inspections. I am saying "this week it should be rented" but I also said that last week. Meanwhile, our prospective renter has been semi-homeless. We hope to post remodeling pictures soon.
I have my first med school interview in a little over two weeks. This one will be at UIC. Pray for me.
Lastly, I read an interesting article about the nature of the problems with the scientific job model. The article aptly compares it to a pyramid scheme. Until it changes, do your loved ones a favor and dissuade them from pursuing the sciences. Friends don't let friends become scientists.
-JohnMark
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Safety Suit
I went to an extremely musically gifted school. I did not go to Juliard or an art school of any type, but the median student could sing, play the piano, play the guitar and dance. As someone with negative amounts of musical ability, it never failed to amaze me. The most important annual event was the battle of the bands tournament leading up to homecoming week. The winner won a "gig" at homecoming. In 2002, some of my friends won the battle of the bands. Their band was named Crew. I went bowling with a guy named Doug (guitarist and lead singer) and I logged a lot of racquetball hours with a guy named (Tate). Flash forward to 2009, they renamed the band Safety Suit. One of their singles, "Someone Like You," was as high as 11th on the VH1 countdown and it is currently available for free on iTunes. I would suggest giving them a listen before iTunes resets its free tunes for the week.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Influences...
Have you ever lost touch with someone that changed your life in a profound, visible way and then found them again? Did you ever think about what you would say to them? I am not a frequent facebooker anymore, but I recently came across my favorite teacher on facebook. We left the school at about the same time. He went on to earn a PhD and teach collegiately, while I went on to college. I didn't know the influence he would have on my life until much later. I always thought of myself as a normal or above average student. Being in gifted & talented classes and scoring in the 99th percentile on standardized tests never managed to shake this perception. I always did just well enough to be in the top few of the class. I only pushed myself with extra curricular activities. At first, I really did not like him, because he would give me a C on a paper that clearly would have been an A paper for most of the other students in the class. (I know that because of the number of papers I edited in the class.) He forced me to test my own ability. Because he demanded more from me, I demanded more from myself. I have ever since. It was nice to be able to tell him that.
Blessings in Disguise
What if we were always able to recognize a blessing in disguise? Well, I'm working on it. So, there was a little hold-up with the Oklahoma house and the HUD inspection. We thought we had everything done, and we could have our renter move in this weekend. However, there was an ambiguous stipulation in the contract that was overlooked so we have to push everything back to next week. Here's the blessing...the inspector let us in on a few more things we could do to raise the rental value of the house. Looks like we can make those changes this weekend. So, we will lose a week of rent, but we gain extra rent money each month. What annoyances have you missed as a blessing in disguise? God know the bigger picture, and we need to trust that He does everything for a reason.
Lee
Lee
Thursday, January 29, 2009
A Prayer for warmth
As many of you may have heard, there have been severe power outages in the center of the country. As if a power outage in the wake of the cold was not enough, service crews are reporting that it could take weeks to restore power. So far, around 30 people have died because of the lack of electricity, cold or weather related issues. Lee's mother is among those seeking a warm spot to stay. Please join me in saying a little prayer for the safety of all of those without adequate shelter right now. Thank you.
-JohnMark
-JohnMark
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Research Economics
Pfizer just anounced that they were finally pulling the ripcord on the merger with Wyeth. At the same time they anounced cutting another 8,000 jobs, which I am sure will be followed by anouncing cutting jobs at Wyeth. Since 2007, they have cut almost 60,000 jobs. I am not an economist, but I have always thought that Pfizer has a terrible business model. Of the global pharmaceutical super powers, Pfizer has more buyouts than all the others combined and it is not nearly as old. Pfizer is in an inflated balloon, absolutely unsustainable. Consequently, they are constantly on the lookout for anything that be able to put air back in the balloon. I have a lot of friends that work for Pfizer, they make sure to update their resumes rather frequently.
I thought that working at a well-funded hospital would be a way of avoiding big pharma's roller coaster ride. I was wrong. University-wide emails reveal that a third of the endowment has been lost in the stock market. Along with the job freezes there have already been a number of cuts in the facilities services. Elevators are out of order, it takes twice as long to receive common supplies, and every day is an experiment with water pressure. Perhaps the greatest loss will occur in April, our NMR (Nuclear Magnetic Resonance) facilities manager is leaving and he will not be replaced. An NMR is as complicated as it sounds, but it is also an invaluable chemistry tool. The way things are going, I give it a couple weeks after he leaves before we have to outsource all of our NMR. At that point, some may wonder why certain forms of research here continue at all.
Just so I end on a lighter note....I saw The Big Bang Theory last night. It is a funny show about some research nerds, which is a huge in-joke for people involved in the sciences because everyone knows someone who IS one of the characters on the show. In last night's epiode, one of them found it more convenient to simply live at the lab. During our all-pain no-gain work schedule, Mike and I used to talk about how convenient it would be if we could just get a cot in the lab. There were several nights I didn't go home.
I thought that working at a well-funded hospital would be a way of avoiding big pharma's roller coaster ride. I was wrong. University-wide emails reveal that a third of the endowment has been lost in the stock market. Along with the job freezes there have already been a number of cuts in the facilities services. Elevators are out of order, it takes twice as long to receive common supplies, and every day is an experiment with water pressure. Perhaps the greatest loss will occur in April, our NMR (Nuclear Magnetic Resonance) facilities manager is leaving and he will not be replaced. An NMR is as complicated as it sounds, but it is also an invaluable chemistry tool. The way things are going, I give it a couple weeks after he leaves before we have to outsource all of our NMR. At that point, some may wonder why certain forms of research here continue at all.
Just so I end on a lighter note....I saw The Big Bang Theory last night. It is a funny show about some research nerds, which is a huge in-joke for people involved in the sciences because everyone knows someone who IS one of the characters on the show. In last night's epiode, one of them found it more convenient to simply live at the lab. During our all-pain no-gain work schedule, Mike and I used to talk about how convenient it would be if we could just get a cot in the lab. There were several nights I didn't go home.
Monday, January 26, 2009
A New Superbowl Tradition?
Many of you know that I have hosted an annual Superbowl Party since I was in college. The first year, a bunch of guys crammed into my office on campus. The commuter lounge had a kitchen right outside the door which was perfectly convenient for such a unique place to watch the game. In graduate school, my roommate, Mike, and I built stadium seating so that we had three full couches and chairs stationed around the tv for the game. In New Jersey I learned the hard way that as people "mature" they are less likely to eat while watching the game. I think I had such an overwhelming surplus that I still had hamburgers and hot dogs for a Memorial Day BBQ. Last year, I had a modest last-second party because the OKC house was a work in progress. This year, it is simply not in the cards (pun not intended). Our place is cozy for two. When we had an engagement party with 8 people, some were forced to sit on cats. Sorry Gravy. A smaller number of people would actually be able to watch the game because of the viewing radius. Lee has been to one of my Superbowl parties and she knew how important it was to me. I had not mentioned the Superbowl at all, as though I had begun grieving for one of the few traditions I have maintained through multiple states and ~8 moves. Lee, however, spent some valuable time finding a cool place for us to go this Sunday. This is one of the many reasons I love my wife. The place she found most intriguing is called Finn McCool's, which is one of the better pub names I have heard. In a small way it made me want to open a bar named Paddy McAwesome's. I am not sure if we will end up there or not, but we have one McCool possibility.
-JohnMark
-JohnMark
Friday, January 23, 2009
The Fun Begins as a Derryberry…
As you all know, I end up dealing with some unhappy customers in my quest to save cancels with the online company I work for. Most of the time, people are very respectful and allow me to walk them through the cancellation process. However, I had one lady who was absolutely irate about our refund policy (she ended up getting a full refund and had all necessary documentation). In the process of yelling at me, she told me she was going to write our corporate office detailing my reluctance to immediately issue her refund. She had my first name and asked for my last name. When I told her it was Derryberry, this really weird snort/laugh sound came out of her mouth. So, I said I had just gotten married and ended up with a really funny last name. Her response was very unique – she told me this was not a time for joking! Most likely, she will end up writing our corporate office referring to me as Lee Derryberry or whatever her real name is…
Lee
Lee
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Rethinking "Obama Nation"
I would imagine that most of you know that yesterday was the Presidential Inauguration. Further, most of you probably know that Obama has a lot of ties to Chicago. His home is a couple blocks from where I work at the University of Chicago. (It is now part of the new employee orientation tour.) On a scale of 1 to 10, local support registers a 73 on the redonculous-o-meter. Yesterday there were people yelling "Obama Nation" on the bus while doing a little jig. It never occurred to me until then that for people that do not enunciate well...it is going to sound like "abomination" everytime.
-JohnMark
-JohnMark
Hard times for the tribune
Many of you probably heard about the Tribune filing for bankruptcy last month. We live very close to the Tribune building, but I had not seen or felt any repercussions myself until today. I receive most of my news in digital form these days and I consider "the paper" a small luxury I do not often afford myself. I, and people like myself, are the reason that news companies are struggling. For this I apologize. We have come to demand top notch reporting without any personal investment, which brings an interesting question: when does the bottom run out? When will we be forced to pay for the news digitally so that reporters can remain solvent? I don't have an answer.
As I alluded to earlier, this morning I witnessed my first repercussion of the Tribune's financial woes. (For Chicagoans) I walk down Clinton from Fulton to Madison every morning. There is an El stop at Clinton & Lake along the way. Every morning I pass by the stop and give a nod and a smile to the guy selling newspapers on the street. He is there rain, shine or cold and it always makes me a little warmer knowing that he can brave the elements for hours on end. Suddenly, my bus stop does not seem so far. I do not know his name. I do not even know if he is (or was) employed by the Tribune, or if he was just selling papers to make a living. I do know he is friendly. There is a blind man that lives somewhere close. I have seen him talking with the newspaper peddler. This morning the newspaper peddler was not there, nor had he been there prior this week. The blind man and his seeing eye dog were waiting there, searching. He couldn't know that the crate was missing. With sad reverence, I informed the blind man. He nodded and we both trudged on. If you are out there newspaper peddler man, I want you to know that you matter. You made a difference in people's lives in ways that you probably do not appreciate.
As I alluded to earlier, this morning I witnessed my first repercussion of the Tribune's financial woes. (For Chicagoans) I walk down Clinton from Fulton to Madison every morning. There is an El stop at Clinton & Lake along the way. Every morning I pass by the stop and give a nod and a smile to the guy selling newspapers on the street. He is there rain, shine or cold and it always makes me a little warmer knowing that he can brave the elements for hours on end. Suddenly, my bus stop does not seem so far. I do not know his name. I do not even know if he is (or was) employed by the Tribune, or if he was just selling papers to make a living. I do know he is friendly. There is a blind man that lives somewhere close. I have seen him talking with the newspaper peddler. This morning the newspaper peddler was not there, nor had he been there prior this week. The blind man and his seeing eye dog were waiting there, searching. He couldn't know that the crate was missing. With sad reverence, I informed the blind man. He nodded and we both trudged on. If you are out there newspaper peddler man, I want you to know that you matter. You made a difference in people's lives in ways that you probably do not appreciate.
A joke about pancreatic cancer
Many of you probably heard about Sen. Ted Kennedy recently. He has a terrible, virtually untreatable form of cancer. In reality, he probably does not a lot of time. My heart goes out to him and his family.
I mention this only because it caused an interesting discussion with some of the other pathology fellows. There have been some recent advances in other areas of cancer research that are very interesting. Many of you probably heard that Patrick Swayze was recently diagnosed with stage-4 pancreatic cancer. However, pancreatic cancer, even late stage like that, is not the death sentence it once was. Naturally, most of the recent advances have been the result of diabetes research. (What else?) My own research at Roche took a similar turn.
To all of the promising research and the hope that it holds for Mr. Swayze, the only thing I had to say was "No one puts cancer in a corner." After the laughter died down, we looked up the misquote and I was disappointed to find that I was ~1000th person to think of it.
-JohnMark
I mention this only because it caused an interesting discussion with some of the other pathology fellows. There have been some recent advances in other areas of cancer research that are very interesting. Many of you probably heard that Patrick Swayze was recently diagnosed with stage-4 pancreatic cancer. However, pancreatic cancer, even late stage like that, is not the death sentence it once was. Naturally, most of the recent advances have been the result of diabetes research. (What else?) My own research at Roche took a similar turn.
To all of the promising research and the hope that it holds for Mr. Swayze, the only thing I had to say was "No one puts cancer in a corner." After the laughter died down, we looked up the misquote and I was disappointed to find that I was ~1000th person to think of it.
-JohnMark
Monday, January 19, 2009
What I am working on...
People are always asking me what I am working on, so I thought I would give everyone a little update. I am currently working on Alzheimer's Disease research in the University of Chicago Hospital Pathology Department. Alzheimer's is caused by a peptide known as Beta Amyloid. Beta Amyloid is a very hydrophobic peptide cleaved from amyloid precursor protein. Because the peptide is very hydrophobic, it aggregates and when it forms a plaque in the brain it blocks neuronal synapses and you have Alzheimer's. There are no empirical tests to see if you have Alzheimer's. In truth, the only conclusive verification is through autopsy. I am synthesizing various forms of the Beta Amyloid peptide so that we can see exactly how it aggregates. If you think of a piece of paper, I am making the paper and we want to watch it crumple. If we can understand the "crumpling" then we might be able to engineer ways to prevent the aggregation, and thus prevent the disease. From a thermodynamic sense it may be impossible to reverse the effects of Alzheimer's without performing a surgery to remove the plaque. That surgery is not currently possible, since the plaque I am talking about is invisible to the naked eye. (I hope you're not eating right now) The plaque is normally separated from the gallimaufry of brain matter through chemical means after the brain tissue has been minced in a blender. Yes, a regular blender. Right now, I am working on replicating a series of mutations* from small family subsets exhibiting really early onset Alzheimer's (~late 30s). Since these mutations produce the aggregates (and thus Alzheimer's) much earlier it is kind of a way of speeding up our research.
*yes, mutations occur in people...some argue that it is the source of all variety and variety is pretty stinking sweet.
-JohnMark
PS Yes, I can openly discuss my research because it is publically funded. I know there were a lot of things I could not mention when I was working in industry.
*yes, mutations occur in people...some argue that it is the source of all variety and variety is pretty stinking sweet.
-JohnMark
PS Yes, I can openly discuss my research because it is publically funded. I know there were a lot of things I could not mention when I was working in industry.
The TV Challenge
I imagine that it is a surprise to no one that I struggle with my weight. I have tried a lot of different things with mitigated success. I worked in metabolic disease research for a long time and I understand all of the physiological realities. While most people try to lose weight before their wedding, I am starting a post-wedding diet regimen. I am a stress eater and I need to get a hold of this before I go to medical school. This time the stakes are high. If I lose 35 pounds by my birthday (8/13) then we purchase a new tv. Nothing fancy, but our current tv is from the late 1980s and I have made it known that I wanted a tv with...you know A/V jacks and stuff. So I am making this public declaration to hold myself more accountable. Please help me earn a tv that will enable us to read the news ticker at the bottom of CNN, ESPN, etc. Thank you. I will try to update everyone along the way.
-JohnMark
-JohnMark
Karaoke Adventures
Saturday we went to our friend Shannon's apartment for a quality N'Orleans dinner: red beans and rice, cornbread, fried chicken and pig tails. I thought the pig tails were pretty good...there just didn't seem to be a lot of meat to them. My penance for trying one was that Lee refused to kiss me until after I brushed my teeth...the pig tails weren't that good. Shannon is a fantastic cook though, as well as an accomplished singer, poet and booty shaker. Despite lessons, we were not able to replicate the booty shaking. Lee and Shannon know each other through the Chicago School so most of the people in attendance were other classmates. Shannon's husband, Mike, and I entertained ourselves with SingStar, a newish Karaoke game for the PlayStation 3. For those of you that don't know, I love to sing and I have negative amounts of innate ability...a disastrous combination. At any rate we had a lot of fun. We were able to bust out our MC Hammer moves for a rendition of "Can't Touch This." I even managed to score "rising star" on "Never Gonna Give You Up." I have since decided that Rick Astley was not very talented.
Our First Marriage Motto
Before we left for the wedding, we saw a series of commercials that Jerry Springer aired to his local Chicago audience. They went something like "Hello Chicago. During the holiday season it is easy to get depressed, so check out my show, because watching other people's misery is almost like feeling better." There was a clip in the middle of a 3-biscuit lady in a tankini standing in front of a young guy with 6 teeth, a pair of boxers and an 80s tie. The guy informed the lady that "You knew what you was gettin' when you got wit it." I almost said it at the altar to help Lee stop crying. It is certainly the answer to every question in the Derryberry household right now:
"Did you take the trash out yet?"
"You knew what you was gettin' when you got wit it."
I encourage everyone to celebrate what they got when they got wit it.
-JohnMark
"Did you take the trash out yet?"
"You knew what you was gettin' when you got wit it."
I encourage everyone to celebrate what they got when they got wit it.
-JohnMark
The Chicago Cold
Sweet Lawd-a-mercy it's been cold up here lately! Our apartment looks out over the Chicago river, which is eerily frozen as though it paused mid-ripple. Have you ever been outside when it's so cold that all the moisture in your nostril freezes the second you step outside? I am not sure that I had prior to last week. I also found out that Chicagoans named the cruel, biting wind off of Lake Michigan "The Hawk." I have never lived anywhere that had a pet name for weather events. Does the rain in Seattle have a name? It feels like it should, the tears or something... Saturday it warmed up to ~20ยบ and I felt like it wasn't worth zipping up my coat. I am told that Punxsutawney Phil is receiving death threats. Written in rabbit's blood they say things like "you best just let your beady lil eyes look elsewhere." Why they are written in rabbits blood I have no idea.
-JohnMark
-JohnMark
Friday, January 16, 2009
A blogging history
I have been reading blogs, specifically chemistry and pharmaceutical blogs, for some time now. I could never think about what I wanted to say though. I thought I would start with something like the Chemist and the City..which seems odd in retrospect since I was not "in" the city at the time. Also, I was not entirely sure that anyone would want to read about vague scientific musings or the kind of ridiculous dating life that seems to be interlaced with urban living. Consequently, I never put fingers to keys.
During the honeymoon, we met some other newly weds and they mentioned the idea of a digital marriage (Fusing to a single social email, calendar, etc.). As part of it they were going to begin a marriage blog as a convenient way of letting everyone know what was going on in their lives. It can be difficult to discern these things from facebook and the like. Lee and I thought it was a good idea...we are certainly tired of forwarding emails. So, here it is our marriage blog....
Relevant event: Marriage- January 3, 2009 Clearwater, FL
-JohnMark
During the honeymoon, we met some other newly weds and they mentioned the idea of a digital marriage (Fusing to a single social email, calendar, etc.). As part of it they were going to begin a marriage blog as a convenient way of letting everyone know what was going on in their lives. It can be difficult to discern these things from facebook and the like. Lee and I thought it was a good idea...we are certainly tired of forwarding emails. So, here it is our marriage blog....
Relevant event: Marriage- January 3, 2009 Clearwater, FL
-JohnMark
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