Rejection

Rejection is one of the hardest emotions to deal with because it is disheartening to the human spirit. It's a hard blow regardless of who you experience rejection from. If you don't know them, you are hurt because they haven't even given you a chance. If it's someone you do know, you are hurt because they are only seeing a part of you, and most likely you feel like that part was/is completely justified.

However, rejection isn't always what it seems. Sometimes, people reject you to protect themselves. For example, if you have a spouse or close friend who is training for a marathon, it can seem that they are choosing to spend time running instead of with you. What you may not recognize is that they need to run for their own sanity and stress relief. Another example would be studying. Your spouse needs to study to prove to them self that they are still able to learn and retain information. They need to feel that they are making progress and have control over the outcome of their education or career.

There are several different way to cope with rejection. First, I'll start with what not to do. Don't retaliate by rejecting them. This only creates feelings of distrust, insecurity, and resentment. The better response is to think through your own emotions. Once you have clarified your own response to the rejection, you will better understand what triggered feelings of rejection. You can then use this self discovery to shape future responses. WARNING - this self discovery will not happen over night. You can logically tell your brain that you understand the circumstances and do not wish to feel rejected any longer. However, your emotions do not change as quickly as your brain can send the electronic message.

Lee